Today's Not Any Better

I haven't slept well the past two nights because Mike's been ill. We thought it was a side effect from the new back meds he got on Monday but when I took him to sick call this morning the doc told him there's a nasty virus going around. I really hope I don't catch it. Mike's back to work though so I have the whole house to myself. Ahhh, peace and quiet! Just what I need because today's not any better than yesterday.  I feel like I'm on the verge of tears but they just won't come.

Friend from yesterday is already wishing her pregnancy away. She also wrote me this message on facebook and I'm not really sure how to take it.

Megan, I know that you have read my post and are probaly hurting from what you read! I thought hard and for a few days before posting.. Due to your situation. But, as my many of my friends have said " you would understand" I really hope you do.. It is the only way to let alot of our family know w/out having to call each and everyone of them. If you choose to keep reading our fb page you know we do not post alot. So you know that there would not be alot of baby news.. But, that is your decision!! I just want you to know that this is not an apology to you.. That this is just what it is a preggo announcement.. I really do hope and I do pray for yall' al the time that it happens for you...I do beleive that you and Mikey would make wonderful parents.....
I am hoping to hear from you soon,
Kim 

I wish she would have e-mailed me before blasting it on facebook but I guess too much to ask for, especially considering we haven't spoken in a few months.  I don't know how to interpret the "This is not an apology to you."  I don't know if she meant "I don't want you to feel even worse by having me apologize to you" or "I do not feel the need to apologize to you because you need to get over yourself."  I don't even know how to respond and I certainly don't have it in me to call her.  Last week I was so stoked that they might be coming here but what will I do if they do? I hate this.

I found this article just a bit ago and it describes how I feel so perfectly.

"It’s not because you’re not happy for them, but it’s because they are living your dream right in front of you."

I almost wish she wouldn't have emailed me at all because it only made me feel worse. Hopefully I will be cheered up tonight because I'm going to the Sounders vs Manchester United match in Seattle. Mike was suppose to go with me but I'm taking my brother instead. I'm thinking about wearing my red shirt with a Sounders scarf but the Seattleites probably wouldn't like that too much. So I'll wear my lime green, cheer, chant and sing. At least there will be beer there.

Last night's official coin toss on top of the Space Needle

P.S.  The flood gates have been opened.